So, once again, I didn't make the Forbes 400 list of the richest people in America.
Okay, the price of admission to the list was $1.3 billion dollars and I have like twenty-two dollars and eighty-six cents.
All the usual suspects made the list - Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, everyone in the world related to Sam Walton. Most of the list is old white guys. (Surprise, surprise.) Ten percent of the list is women. Oprah is on it. (Again, surprise, surprise.)
The guy who founded Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, is on the list, he's worth $1.5 billion. Oh, and he's twenty four. Yeah. Twenty-four. When I was twenty-four the sum total of my assets was a crappy Ford Tempo and whatever change I could find on the floor and in the seats of the said Ford Tempo. This guy can buy a small country and I had trouble finding enough cash to buy two tacos at Jack In The Box.
Sheldon Adelson lost almost half of his fortune this year and that would make me sad if he didn't still have a net worth of $15 billion dollars. So forgive me, Shelly, if I don't cry too much for you.
I guess what upsets me the most about this list (besides not being on it) is that it represents a kind of wealth that we normal people can't understand. Or at least I can't, maybe you're different. I wouldn't know what it's like to not think about the cost of things. I buy marked down produce and shop the clearance racks at Ross. My mom works at a day-old bread store. That's the reality of my life and it's okay, I'm used to it. But these guys have more money than most people could ever even dream about. I can't fathom money in the billions. A million is still a whole lot of dough to me, and these people have thousands of millions.
Sure, I can imagine of what it might be like to be one of the mega-rich. But I'd still be looking at the prices on the menu and thinking that two tacos are only ninety-nine cents and that 'poulet a la valee d'auge' is really just roast chicken anyway and how can they charge so much for it? Why would I spend six figures on an Hermes Birkin Bag when that's more money than I spent on college? The twenty dollar purse from Target holds my wallet and cell phone just fine. And private jets are not exactly eco-friendly.
Who wouldn't want to be rich? Nobody I know. It would be lovely to give generously to charity and eat and shop wherever you want. To go on vacations that don't require coupons and online discount hotels. But my life is grounded in reality and I'll never be a part of that world. Foe me, I'd settle for not worrying about where car repair money is going to come from. Think that Facebook guy would give it to me?
