Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I'm No Saint

This week has been a roller coaster with The Graminator. In January she was complaining of extreme fatigue. So much so that she just wanted to sleep all the time. It's not healthy to sleep that much and we were very concerned about her quality of life. I read an article about the possibility that vitamin B-12 could help the elderly with not only fatigue but also dementia symptoms. So I started her on a sublingual B vitamin complex. And it changed her dramatically.

She stopped complaining of fatigue and was more alert, able to exercise more and became more participatory. She started reading the paper again. We were really surprised and pleased with the results. Even my Aunt, who lives in Florida, noticed the difference, when she spoke to The Graminator on the phone and was able to hold a conversation with her. Before phone calls were mostly one word answers, now she was chatting away.

Then a couple of weeks ago The Graminator got a UTI. We sent her tests off to the lab and the doctor called in a prescription for an antibiotic. She was on the antibiotic for a couple of days when the doctor's office called and said that the infection she had was resistant to the antibiotic she was on and to replace it with a different one they prescribed. So even though her symptoms seemed to be improving, we changed her medication. I don't know what was in that stuff, but it was not fun. Her memory got horrible again, she was tired and not only did I feel like we had regressed to where she was in January but that it was actually worse. Plus you don't even want to know about how it changed her digestive system.

So last Thursday was the last day on the antibiotic but by Sunday morning there wasn't really much improvement. On the way to Val's shower I had to tell here where we were going about thirty times. But coming home from the shower, she was bright and animated and very chatty. I don't know if it was seeing a baby or what, but it was a marked improvement. She had a doctor's appointment on Monday morning. On the way there she told me that while she wasn't depressed, she wasn't as "gay" as she used to be. (Boy, how word meanings have changed, huh?) She was upset about her incontinence and her lack of ability to do all that she did in her younger days. I can sympathize, it must be awful. But her doctor's visit went great, she has now gained all of the weight she lost during the hospital/rehab days and I can stop constantly nagging her to eat more (I'm still going to nag, just not as much), her blood pressure was excellent, everything looked wonderful. And she was so chatty with the doctor, her doctor was impressed (and said that the B vitamins weren't interfering with anything so I could keep giving them to her.)

So the rest of Monday, she was so active and chatty I couldn't keep up. She read the Sunday paper, the Monday paper and every magazine we had laying around. And by reading, I mean reading and understanding. She was reading me articles and saving columns for my mom to read and ripping recipes out of magazines for me to try. She was like a spinning top. I couldn't get any chores done because she was so active. She did 9 laps (a small circuit around out living room/kitchen area that I have her walk several time a day for exercise) without even slowing town (we usually do sets of four to six). And then she stayed up watching "Dancing With the Stars". Whew.

Of course, all that activity wore her out so yesterday she was practically narcoleptic. But we'll get back into the routine and I am now pretty confident that it was the antibiotic that was interfering with her brain chemistry and now that she's over it we'll regain the memory and activity that we lost. Yay! Learning about Alzheimer's has been a challenge. But I totally recommend to anyone with a loved one who is experiencing Alzheimer's or dementia to try the sublingual B vitamins. I don't know if it would work for others as well as it has worked for us, but it's certainly worth a try!

The title of the post was that I'm not saint and here's why. My friend Maura mentioned in a comment on this blog that I was great for doing all that I do plus cheerfully taking care of The Graminator. Well, that's so sweet an much appreciated, but let me tell you that it doesn't feel all that cheerful to me sometimes. I feel terrible, always nagging her, telling her what to do or what not to do, getting frustrated when she can't comprehend something or forgets. I feel like an awful person most of the time. If I rationalize my feelings, I think it's been worse lately because of the terrible incontinence and problems associated with the antibiotic. Now that she's better I feel optimistic again. Also, my mom has been working six days a week since Thanksgiving and I have had very little time for myself. I know that sounds horribly selfish, but I'm selfish sometimes, I told you that I'm no saint. But my Mom finally had a day off last Friday and I took a few hours for myself (okay, it was running errands after the table read but it was still time away) and I really needed it. being a 'parent' is a 24/7 job and can get overwhelming sometimes. I have a new respect for all parents and caregivers out there. You get all of the work and none of the glory.

Anyway, thanks for reading about the current chapter in The Graminator saga. Sorry this post wasn't more edifying or entertaining, I'll aim for that tomorrow!

P.S. I was able to do my part of the writer's tennis and it has now been passed on to Maura - hopefully she got the email- and when it's finally completed by Dyann then I'll post the finished story on this blog and we'll take Loyal Reader suggestions for a title. The winner gets...well, nothing. But it'll still be fun.

2 comments:

Maura said...

I did get the email. I haven't had a chance to read it yet but I will start work on it asap. I am looking forward to it!

Don't be so hard on yourself. I'll bet you are cheerful around her a lot more often than you think. And it can't be easy dealing with an Alzheimer's patient and all the crappy baggage that comes along with that. If you didn't succumb to it once in a while I would suspect you were some sort of a pod-person.

But you never ever fail to mention how much you love your Graminator and I know you would do anything for her. And if it isn't always with a sunny smile, I guarantee you it's definitely with a better attitude than what she would receive in a health care facility.

So don't you dare feel guilty. You are doing a great job and I think you are perfectly within your rights to seek a little more time for yourself. We all need to recharge our batteries at some point, you probably more than the average person.

As always, in my opinion, YOU ROCK!!!

dyann hunter said...

Here Here! OR is it Hear Hear! :-)

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